The Essence of Success

Reading my fellow bloggers' posts can be frustrating, annoying, inspirational, exciting, and everything in between. Every so often, however, I get actual nuggets of wisdom that click with me - things that are worth holding onto, and using.

The What: Excess Weight

Allan (blog: Almost Gastric Bypass) has been writing a lot lately about attitudes and actions. What he is saying, in essence, is:

This is hard work. This is what you know you need to do. Stop your whining and DO it, if you want to succeed.

Okay, that was actually my quick summary of Allan's messages of late.

Do you know what that is called? Two words:

Taking Responsibility

And he's right. I've been guilty, at times, of whining - though I hope not often or for long. And I need to stop it.

I am where I am because of ME.

No excuses. No defenses.

I, and I alone, picked unhealthy things to eat, too often, and in quantities too great. And I did this over a LONG time.

It really is as simple as that.

So, now I have to fix this. It won't be quick. It won't be fun. It might even be annoying and inconvenient, but it is my responsibility.

How fast, or how slow, or to what level of success, will simply depend upon my level of commitment, dedication, and to what extent I take this responsibility seriously.

It IS a matter of life or death - mine.

This extra weight directly affects my ability to enjoy the things I want to do, and to great extent my ability to participate in life's little adventures. So, when Allan says he wants to lose weight more than he wants that cookie, I get it. I do.

The Why: Failure to Exercise Self-Control

Sometimes, words of wisdom come from comentary to posts, rather than posts directly. Karyn (blog: Metamorphosis) commented on my previous post with this:

"... I love this feeling of being in control of my actions, instead of letting temptations and a desire for instant gratification rule the day.

The ultimate gratification will come down the line when we love what we see in the mirror, and when we feel healthier than we've felt in years. ..."

Amen, Karyn, Amen!

She is speaking to the very heart of what got me to where I am today.

I cared more for instant gratification than control.

The justifications don't really matter. I cannot change the past, but only control what I do from this point forward. So, I work hard to make one good decision after another. Sometimes, the decisions aren't perfect, but you work with what you are presented. If the options aren't great, I pick the best one, minimize the impact to the best of my ability, and don't look back.

The How: Semantics

The math works. Science has proven this.

If I take in fewer calories than I expend, I will lose weight.

Now, how anyone goes about creating this deficit will vary. We all have our preferences, and varying levels of commitment. For me, I've chosen a low fat diet. I think I can sustain this style of eating, and I am enjoying it. Most importantly (to me), it is working.

If it stops working, I need to re-emphasize the math and see what I did wrong in my diet selections.

I will have failed, not the food.

So, it is up to me to make corrections and adjustments as I go along. No one is perfect.

And I recognize the science of it, so I expect the body to make adjustments that will cause the loss to fluctuate or stall every so often.

When that happens, it will be my responsibility to carry on doing the right thing, making those good decisions. No excuses. No whining.

The Who: Who Else?

Me, myself, and I.

Since I am finally putting my health as a priority, I decide what works for me and what doesn't. No apologies.

A person is either with me or against me in my efforts - and if s/he isn't with me, too bad for that person. I'm not giving him or her much of my time or consideration. (Who am I going out to lunch with next time? The girlfriend who said, "Oh, just eat the cheese on the salad. A little bit isn't going to kill you." Or the friend who said, "Send it back, they screwed up." ???)

It sounds selfish, I know, but I don't want to be buried in an oversized coffin next year, with folks milling around saying what a nice person I was.

I'd rather be alive and liked a little less.

I can be more generous, when I'm not fighting for my life.

That said, if I misstep, I expect someone to call me on it. Challenge me. If coming from a helpful position, I can respect that - and appreciate it.

THIS is the stuff that works, proven by those who've been there and done that - and are sustaining their normal weights. I've been doing a lot of general research, as well as a lot of reading of blogs, all over the place.

There is a lot of "stuff" out there, but weeding through it all, I am finding wise words which speak to me of the essence of success.