I wasn't going to post this, because it just highlights how stupid I can be, but scary stuff happens ...
My husband's pager went off at 4:30 a.m. today, so off to the shower he went, to begin his day. However, for me, it is still an hour before I have to get up, so I'm laying there, trying to fall back to sleep. His pager goes off - again.
Now I'm awake.
Well, I roll over onto my back and sort of brace myself to begin the day. At that moment, I realize I have an itch, just under my waistband on the right side. I slide my hand down to scratch it ... and feel a lump! Now, if THAT doesn't wake you up, nothing will.
So, now I'm completely concentrating on this lump that wasn't there before. I'm rubbing it, poking it, trying to move it ... does it hurt? No. Is that a good sign or a bad sign? Can it move?
I spent no less than five minutes, messaging this mysterious lump, and trying to figure out when to squeeze in a doctor appointment to have it examined.
I'm still on my back at this point. Then, I begin to wonder how big is this thing. I figure I'll compare it to the left "lumpless" side. I slide my left hand down to the symmetrically similar location ...
And discover IT has a lump too!! What the heck?! So, now I'm rubbing both lumps, contrasting and comparing. Neither hurts, neither moves ... and hey, they are exactly the same size and symmetrically located.
W a i t a m i n u t e ...
Oh, for Pete's sake. They are BONES. I'm laying on my back, and at 4:30 this morning, my hip bones decided to reemerge for the first time in probably 10-12 years. Sheesh! And yes, I felt like a complete idiot. LOL
On the plus side, I've apparently lost enough fat off those areas that, as long as I'm on my back, the bones can actually be felt. Glad to know they are still in there somewhere. LOL
I thought everyone could use a good laugh this morning. I'm an idiot.
OMG, I had a similar reaction a bit ago with my wrist bones... so don't feel bad!
ReplyDeleteYou are too funny !!!
ReplyDeleteI thinks that's a true sign of progress!
ReplyDeleteThe first time I felt my triceps in Basic Training,
I thought the Army had implanted pencils in my arms
while I was sleeping! What a dummy I was!
Look! Matching Tracking Devices! omg....
HAHAHAHAHAHA I was totally sh*tting myself... LUMPS... OH NOOOOO!!!!!
ReplyDeletehilarious! :D
Oh, what a great laugh I had reading this! Thank you! I too, discovered bones in my body recently! Amazing what we've had under all of those layers!
ReplyDeleteROFLOL -- Tracking devices, huh? Okay Anne, THAT beats symmetrical mysterious "lumps" any day ... at least I didn't think "government implants" (plural, no less) - because we all know, one just isn't good enough! That was way funnier, Anne. Now I don't feel quite so goofy.
ReplyDelete:)
Welcome to my world, Allan.
Angry, you too?!!! LOL Thanks for the giggle!
I need to write a book - "Fat People Think The Darndest Things" (with apologies to the Late Art Linkletter)
Tamzin, I know, right?! hehehe And that I didn't figure it out right away ... Nothing like starting my day with a "duh" moment. lol
ReplyDeleteGetting Fit, I'm always glad to have others join with me in laughing at life's little quirks. This was sure one of them! I laughed at your phrasing, that you "discovered bones" in your body. You knew you had them in there somewhere, right? hehehe And yes, it is amazing what we've been hiding under all those layers!
Thank YOU guys for the laughs too!!
Some lumps are good lumps :)
ReplyDelete=))) I'll be chuclking about this for days...thanks Ann!
ReplyDeleteOMG Ann you had me going. I immediately thought about my battle with shingles in February. Wouldn't wish that on anyone. Another NSV. Your body is becoming more defined. Congrats!
ReplyDelete~Sheilah
Hysterical. Your boney-back story definitely made me smile.
ReplyDeleteLOL! Don't feel bad! I did something similar with my hip bones! Isn't it funny! thanks for posting your moment of new found body parts!
ReplyDelete:)
ReplyDeleteI still feel my new collar bone quite a bit lol. When my hip bones stick out a little more, I'll be feeling them all the time I'm sure- except now it will always remind me of this story!!! lol
Too funny!!
ReplyDeleteBones? we have bones? Oh, I think I felt one or two of my own. Completely know where you are coming from. May 2010 I joined Nutrisystem and have lost so far 26 lbs....it has been slow but I am amazed at all I can do - like breathe. They say the slower you lose the longer you keep it off...will be following your journey while being on my own....keep up the good work.
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